In Which Our Heroines Use Cake As Bribery (the First)

NOTE: We’ve subtitled this chapter as ‘the First’, because we believe the ‘Cake As Bribery’ technique will feature frequently in both this blog, and our lives. In fact, when we inevitably give everything else up to become professional cake-mistresses (Cake Girls? Cakeheads? Cake-y-Break-y Hearts? Cake Sluts?), the smallest available size of cake will be known as our ‘Bribery’ size.

We modern girls have to use every weapon we have at our disposal in this harsh, work-a-day world. Our brains. Our sexuality. Our baking skills. Mostly the latter. Especially when one’s sexuality is compromised by constantly eating cake. And one’s face is often smeared with cake. And one is only turned on by cake. So we bake to forget our troubles, and to celebrate our accomplishments. To kiss today goodbye, and to point towards tomorrow. Wish me luck, the same…to….you…..we also often listen to musicals.

Mickey lives in a wonderful apartment, in a great part of the city. However, one thing is sadly missing: a kitty. Her otherwise-pretty-great landlords said it wasn’t an option. But doesn’t that sound more like a challenge then a refusal? Being two highly educated girls with plenty of moxie, we took it as such. So, upon being reunited after being separated by an ocean for three weeks while Mickey traveled Europe, we came together to travel halfway across Toronto to spend two hours and a lot of money at Bulk Barn, and to win her landlords over, come hell or high water.

So we made a kitty-cat cake! Wouldn’t you let us have a pet if we gave you this cake?

We thought so.

UPDATE: Mickey's landlords are clearly super-human life forms and/or robots, impervious to the charms of frosting and batter. They ignored the cake and her for a while, and then came out and said, 'no'. Just 'no'. Honestly, who walks by a mysterious box in their hallway for hours (nay, days) before finally opening it? And then, who opens the box, finds an amazing cake, and says NO!? Who could resist such a beautiful kitty-cat cake, clearly made with loving precision by two equally beautiful girls, one of whom has been an excellent tenant, about which they can have no complaints?

We are slightly disillusioned by the unhappy discovery that cake does not win all battles. It is equal in sadness and confusion to Max’s recent terrifying realization that there are problems that even Miss Vicki can’t solve. However, we are daunted, but not undone. The solution? More cake!

P.S. Mickey went ahead and got a damn cat anyway! His name is Link.